Tatoo Jokes
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I think it's pretty cool Chinese people made a language made entirely out of tattoos.
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How does a leopard change its spots? When it gets tired of one spot it just moves to another!
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Nothing makes me worry more than the kids saying "Don't worry, we cleaned it up"
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How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the lightbulb has to want to change.
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Animal testing is pointless. We already know they're animals.
Beauty
Top Games
Free app/game: Cat Run
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Why do women like men with moustaches? Because they immediately see something about you they can change.
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I was dating an archaeologist but I had to break up with her. Turns out she was a gold digger...
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Cop: "Are you driving under the influence?" Me: "No." Cop: "Say the alphabet backwards." Me: "Tebahpla eht."
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Why couldn't the restaurant patron get into his car? He had Gnocchi.
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Why do elephants have big flat feet? A: To stomp out burning ducks.
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What do you call it when a bunch of druggies talk to each other? Joint-Discussion.
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If I ever need a heart transplant, I'd want my ex's. It's never been used.
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I am writing a book about the history of camping. It's all in past tents.
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My grandfather got new pants the other day. I asked him how they fit... He said "Like a cheap castle." Seeing the confused look on my face, he elaborated, saying, "No ball room."
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A man walks into a bar... ...and loses the international limbo championship.
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Why did the programmer get a job at the photographers? They needed a developer.
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Why doesn't a sociologist look out the window in the morning? Because then they'd have nothing to do in the afternoon.
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How long do I have to lay on the couch in the same position before I can call it "yoga"?
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Two Flies Are Sitting On a Piece of Shit. The first fly farts. The other gives him a disgusted look and says, "Come on man! I'm eating here!"
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Happy Valentines! A little early I know, but l suffer from premature congratulation...
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What should you do if a monster runs through your front door? Run through the back door.
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What's the difference between talking to your wife after you forgot something and a minefield? You can actually get through the minefield alive.
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